Thursday, October 26, 2006

ORANGE CRUSH: ACT I -- Tennessee

Think of it as a three-act epic, with intermissions/restroom breaks. It's the Orange Crush, South Carolina's annual gamut including the two kings of the SEC East and the rivalry game with the cow-tippers of the Upstate. (This year's intermissions/restroom breaks are SEC West rival Arkansas and the rent-a-rout game against Middle Tennessee State.)

So C&F will break down the Orange Crush team by team. Beginning with this weekend's showdown with Tennessee:

1. Villain (i.e., opponents head coach.)
The Blob: A massive, gelatinous fellow who can shake the earth by rolling over.

Even Alabama boosters' lawsuits can't stop him.

2. Mascot
Smokey: A blue tick coon hound who, it turns out, is surprisingly vicious.

Will bite you in the butt without hesitating.

3. Lame Tradition
It's close, what with the checkered end zones and all. But you have to go with the Vol Walk, or as the Knoxville Police Department calls it, the Perp Walk.

4. High Point of the Year
Hanging 27 on Georgia in the fourth quarter, 51 overall. I would say they put the Dawgs in their place, but I live in Atlanta and I don't want a midnight visit by the State Patrol.

5. Proof that God Hates Orange
The 2005 season.

6. Spurrier's Record Against Tennessee: 9-4.


Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home